More We-ness, Less Separateness
Happy couples think more about “we” than “me.” In other words, they tend to think about their decisions, goals, and desires with the relationship in mind rather than themselves without their partner. One key for this step, however, is that each individual will have a different level of desired “we-ness.” Fortunately, if you think there is enough “we-ness” in your relationship, then you will be happier, whether or not it is the same level of “we-ness” as another couple.